This week has been a blur and this will be short, but there more be more later after I can get some rest. I was going to write about my New Year's resolution, which will just have to wait for a bit.
For now I just want to ask for prayers for my baby. He was admitted into the NICU at the local children's hospital for RSV and possible other issues. He is doing ok, but not out of the woods yet.
It can be so easy to go through days, months and years forgetting what real problems feel like and look like.
When your baby gets sick, every other worry just melts away and all you can think about is doing everything you can to make them feel better. You forget what time or day it is and what bills need to be paid or laundry needs to be completed. As I'm sure most parents can attest, you would do anything to take the pain they are feeling away and have it happen to you.
As they spent more than a half hour the other day in the ER poking and prodding his arm for a vein to stick the IV in as he screamed harder and longer than I have ever heard him scream I thought how am I supposed to be the mom? I can't handle this. I can't possibly do this without a lot of support. Then I was reminded of something amazing.
In the middle of this storm and chaos, I already had everything I ever needed. I have someone who will hold me up when I can't walk and who will carry me when I can't make it any further. I love the song by Casting Crowns "Praise You In This Storm". You can read the lyrics here.
I honestly believe all the things that happen in our lives, the good, the bad and the difficult all serve a purpose and help shape us into the people we are. They are our chance to grow in our faith and become the people God intended us to be.
It's not always easy. I've struggled with it a lot in the past few days, but it is possible to take the difficulties and create opportunities. I spent a lot of time reciting a photo I still have that my confirmation sponsor gave me oh so many years ago, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."
More later, but in the meantime please keep my baby boy in your prayers. He is struggling but we have all hope he will be just fine in the next week or weeks.